today sucks. my back has hurt all day. blah. I got a new ball thing for my rat so she can run around on the floor in it and my dogs cant eat her, it's pretty cool, she chases the cat. Saw Magni today. beginning to wonder what and where do i want to be in the future? What are my options? maybe there is somewhere else I should be. a different locale who knows. everything is fuzzy right now and I see the error in making long term plans so I am going to stop doing that right now. so who gives a fuck about the future right? well not exactly. Magni leaves in like two weeks. or something like that. so I guess I will have a lot of time to myself. which is good. I am hoping everything works out but I am not sure if it will, I dont know everything. but I do know I dont want another relationship. not for a very long time. like a year or two. and no random fucks either I cant deal with that either. it must be nice to be a guy, they dont have to "deal with it" they just do it and who gives a fuck. but oh well I have to go now. adios.